I haven’t had the best relationship with you. I can’t exactly pinpoint when our love-hate relationship started but bottomline is, I don’t know when I should or shouldn’t eat you.
I want to thank you first and foremost, for giving me the energy to do my tasks as a medical student, my role as a sister, a friend, and a leader .You became my bestfriend aside from writing. When my parents fought, I ate. When I get low scores, I eat. When traumatic stuff happens, I eat.
I want to really apologize to you because I used you as a drug. You numb me from reality and gratify my need for life’s simple pleasures faster than a lightning bolt.
I know that it’s not healthy to use you in order to shove off these turbulent feelings. You were not meant to be a coping mechanism with life’s unpredictable twists and turns. That one cup of rice, one more serving of chicken, just one last bite. You are worth more than what I used you for.
I created an illusion that things will be okay as long as I have good food. But here me out please, I have to make peace with you and use you for your real purpose, which is to nourish my body. I have to take care of this body because this is the vessel by which all the ideas and creativity that come from the ultimate source will fluorish.
I have to consume you moderately in order for this body to function optimally.
It has been my belief that all of us have been put in this earth to fulfill our life’s purpose. Therefore, we owe it to the universe to be kind and loving to our body. That would involve feeding it with what it needs, not too much nor too little.
Again, this is not about looking good so that others would approve of me, or that guys will like me. This is about making the best out of the body that has been entrusted to me. So let’s start this journey.
kate samaniego 