I wish I could be a hundred percent honest with you.
I wish I could tell you that I miss our conversations about anything under the sun.
I wish you didn’t build a wall and close everybody off.
I wish you were consistent and honest.
I wish you were ready.
I wish you didn’t put me to a test that I was not aware of.
I wish I haven’t met you so I wouldn’t be this confused and affected.
I wish I could turn back time and not have talked to you under that huge mango tree cause both of us didn’t like to drink.
I wish I just remained inside my safe cocoon and not have had myself open up to you.
I wish I could tell myself that you are nothing to me.
I wish I could unlike you.
I wish you didn’t pique my interest.
I wish we never had intellectual conversations in the first place.
I wish I’d have told you that I was sapiosexual and that you have to stay as far away as possible.
I wish when you asked me if you needed to stay away, I’d said yes.
I wish I could see your flaws.
I wish all those flaws would be enough for me to forget you and not be interested anymore.
I wish after writing about you over and over again, my feelings would also dry up.
I wish I could focus now and stop thinking about you.
I know that I can. Just give me time.
And if you happened to read this you would realize that I’m a master of hiding my feelings and lying when it comes to matters of the heart.
Yes, I’m that afraid.